email me. feel awesome.

28 June 2009


Gotta love random music, like the music I'm listening to right now, which seems everlasting. It's very fun, though. Nice bouncy atmosphere.
Anyway, on Friday Katelyn and I decided to get all dressed up and go for a semi-formal date, and it was very much indeed! We were ultimately sexy, as seen by the photomographicuses. We went to see the movie My Sister's Keeper, and it made me cry so bad! My goodness. They call it a tear jerker for a reason. If you haven't seen it, go check it out. If you dig movies like that. If you don't know what "like that" means, exactly, then go Google it for yourself or something. Actually, using a search engine with a black background is more environmentally friendly, as it uses less energy than a white background. So do that.
Then yesterday Katelyn and Alexandria and I went to a Latin festival at the Mountain, and it was wondrous. It was sort of boring at first, as we were not doing anything at all, really, but then I was volunteered for this like basic Latin dancing thing in front of everyone, so I had a good time doing that, shaking my booty and whatnot. Then there was this dance studio there, and they were all dancing very sexy Latin-y dances, and we were privileged enough to ogle these beautiful black men, so perfectly sculpted as dancers are, and it was awesome. Then, after a pit stop at the overpriced Starbucks, Alexandria went and danced to the live band that was there as if we were a couple, because we brought no boys, and that was really very fun! Then we watched the dance studio dancers again, except they were in the middle of a thing and were like switching partners and it was so free and fun-looking and so wonderfully not choreographed. I really enjoyed it. Then there was fireworks to finish the night off, and while we watched the Earth's atmosphere cringe, we all smiled primitively at the bright lights and big sounds, and it was nice.

26 June 2009

I wish this was a sonnet

Happy birthday to Courtland, my brother, who is eighteen today. He's getting very old, you see. I wish I had a job so I could have money so I could give him something nice. My plan is to make him something for tomorrow, when my dad will be here to celebrate and there will be cake and singing and whatnot.
In other news, I went to kickboxing with Mugs. It was good stuff, I hope to do it again. We discovered my right leg roundhouses are pretty good, so that's good stuff, but I feel bad for my left leg. He was kind of getting ignored.
In other news, I went to the beach today and my back is a little burnt, but not really, and it should be gone by tomorrow, possibly earlier tonight. Katelyn and I are going to the movies this fine evening, and we are going to dress up and wear nice shoes and it will be fabulous. It seems kind of ridiculous to dress up for sitting in the dark and then not even look at the person next to you, especially when the movies are regarded as such a casual thing, but we're doing it anyway. Katelyn wants to get better at walking in heels, and I just want to dress pretty. I'm already wearing my dress and I feel most scrumptious. I shall accessorize most applicably with my new black and white bag of sexiness, brought to you (or rather, me) by Alexander Robert Mugford. His initials spell arm! Heh, heh. Anyway, after the movie, I'm going to stay at Katelyn's and it will be wondrous.
I want to write a sonnet, but on what? Suggestions? I will probably think of one later, but hey! You should tell me what you want a sonnet on, and I'll do it for you and it can be dedicated to you. That will give me something to do.

24 June 2009


I had a blog all written out and awesomely set to be blogged, but I can't seem to find it, which is mighty unfortunate. I guess I will have to make you suffer through this unplanned blog of potentially disastrous spontaneity.
Today was very awesome. And it is continuing to be awesome, and will continue to be awesome, and shall be followed up by another awesome day tomorrow. Today I got up at around seven, and I gleefully took my time wandering around the house, walking Clara and preparing some fabulous banana bread for myself. Then I read my Bible and prayed and journalled for about and hour or so, and then I shaved my legs! They are smooth like smoothies. Like a strawberry-almond-frozen yogurt smoothie of delicious. Then I got like a bunch of housework done, as well as walking Clara again, all before noon! It was very wonderful. Then I went to Mugs and we hung out till I went to dance, which was so hot it was dangerous, I'll bet. Stupid tights and their hotness.
So, after that, I was going to chill with Mugs' mom until he was off work, but then I remembered I wanted to go to yoga, so I canceled that micro-plan. Sorry Diana. Anyway, I went to yoga and it was very relaxing and such, and I liked the instructor (whose name happened to be Scott), but right near the end a bunch of crazy alarms started to go off, so our instructor leapt up quite nimbly and scrambled out of the room, so we were all kind of sitting there halfway through a movement with no instructor. We all talked a little bit and eventually the alarms went off and he came back in, panting slightly. And we finished the class with little acknowledgment or comprehension of what had happened, but yoga was good nonetheless. As a side note, Scott had fabulous legs. They were quite muscular and he was unusually flexible for a man, as well as having wonderful feet that pointed ever so nicely, which leads me to believe he has some sort of dance background. Also, the way he moved his hands was rather balletic, so that is further evidence for my case. Elanor is teaching on Monday, so I'm excited to go to that class. She is a wonderful woman.
I shall be going to Mugs once he's off work, and I'm thinking he is probably going to buy me Starbucks, because he is secretly attempting to fatten me up and eat me in the cannibalistic way he does things. Your plan has been foiled, Mugs. Foiled!
Tomorrow will be awesome because I'm helping out with Katelyn's brother's birthday party. Yay! I love helping out at his parties. And by helping out I mean hanging up a few streamers and then sitting on Katelyn's pool deck to "supervise" the swimming, also known as tanning on the pool deck, as well as getting sweet deals on the ice cream cake.
My ballet exam is also tomorrow, so that shall be most wondrous.
Still job hunting, still wishing jobs just magically came, because job hunting sucks very, very much.
Possibly Pepi's?

21 June 2009

Update! Ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!

*Alarm bells ring*
I have a new heart. Martin decided to replace his Heart of Lions with a Heart of Polar Bears, so he changed mine while he was at it. I now have a Heart of a 32-inch Diamond Vision Flat Screen or something like that. At any rate, it's better than having pop tarts in my heart. Pop Tarts are very bad for you, you see.
That's all.
*Alarm bells stop*


I haven't blogged in a very long time indeed.
Well, I'm pretty nervous right about now, and kind of stressed. Not very stressed though. Mostly nervous.
Arr, I'm getting repetitive in my old age.
Anyway, the reasons for this nervousness consist of two exams and a recital. Well, actually, one of the exams isn't so nerve-racking. Tomorrow I have the arithmetic, and that is the one I'm slightly nervous for. It's just formulas and whatnot that I need to memorize though, so I should be ok. I'll crack down tonight and then go early tomorrow for the some last-minute cramming. People say it doesn't help to cram, but I find it does. Then the stuff is really very fresh in your brain.
I'm finished all my other exams. The other exam of which I speak is ballet, on Thursday. I'm as ready as I'll ever be for it, except my pirouettes. I seem to remember freaking out about my pirouettes this time last year too, hm? Yes. Pirouettes are bad news bears. But the rest of it is all good. I'll do fine on it. But I have many rehearsals before then.
What I am most supremely worried about is my singing recital. Oh. My. Goodness. Singing? In front of people? Terrifying! If I'm dancing in front of people, it feels so amazing. It's the greatest. Even if I was in a play or a skit in class or something and I'm a character it's all good. It's just when I'm plain old singing, it's very frightening indeed. Because I'm just myself. And it's just a song. And it's awful.
So, I'll be praying for confidence on Tuesday for sure. Tuesday as in the day of the singing.
I also am totally jobless after having applied at several places I know were hiring. I'm going to apply at everywhere, even if they're not hiring, just in case. I haven't worked since March. I have a total of five dollars.
It is a bad time to be out of work.
It is an even worse time to turn fourteen.
Katelyn's brother is turnign fourteen soon, which is making me feel ancient, as I still think of him as being in grade four, despite the good three inches he has on me now, and the massive eruption of puberty that he and his friends are experiencing. I am in great denial of this. He is not allowed to be tall. He is in grade four.
Anyway, he seems to think that he will be able to get a job magically as soon as he turns fourteen because he'll be fourteen, but he is misguided. Katelyn ad I have told him so. I have experience in work and I'm older, and I can't get a job. He can expect nothing less than an empty wallet.
Then there's stupid Katelyn, hogging all teh jobs! She has three jobs! Ugh! I'm envious of her job-having prowess. All of them without an interview, even. Just POOF! and job is hers. I wish! Don't get me wrong, I'm happy she is rolling in job titles. I just wish I had one too.
So, that is my life right now. Math, singing, ballet, joblessness.
On the good side of things, however, I shall be taking Tae Kwon Do in the fall, and hopefully I shall take traditional Tae Kwon Do, so my already fabulous thighs will become the Outrageous Thighs of Justice. I also plan on doing kickboxing with Mugs during the summer, and possibly Jiu Jitsu. Which shall be awesome. I'm finding that martial arts is giving me happiness.
So I guess that is also my life right now. Math, singing, ballet, joblessness, martial arts.
And Mugs, of course.
Over and out.
Ha ha! As if I just said over and out. What is wrong with me. Well, many things. But let's not go into detail. It's a very beautiful day outside, I feel pretty and I'm going to go enjoy the niceties. Have a good life, ghosts. Hopefully we can once again have one-sided conversations more often.

10 June 2009

My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean

My blog feels like it hurts these days. It doesn't feel nice to come to my blog, not today. I'm only blogging because it feels like if I do maybe it won't be a sad place any more. It's supposed to be nice to come here, but it isn't right now, and that sucks. I don't know why it is, I can't explain it, it just is. And I do not like it.

05 June 2009

I Feel like Thinking

I was thinking about how people say, "I think I love you" to people, and it made me wonder if that was even possible.
How can you think you love someone? Love is a feeling, not a thought. But then, that brings up the question of whether or not feelings and thoughts are independent of each other. Does one have to feel a thought? Does one have to think a feeling? Does a thought register as a thought regardless of any current feelings, or does a thought come a result of them? It is like density-dependent or independent factors in a ecosystem. How can you feel logic? Logic asks that you ignore your feelings and base your conclusions solely on the wisdom gained from past experiences. But how can you think a feeling? A feeling just is, sometimes without explanation. But then again! What if you understand the reason for a feeling? Logic and reasoning go hand in hand, thus, you would be logically, reasonably justifying an impulsive, infinite feeling. Arr! How can you even define a feeling? Is it possible? The impossibility of it implies the immense difference and independence between and of the two.
Or perhaps this impossibility assures not the conflict of thought and feeling, but the co-dependence. Perhaps it shows the circular nature of the thought-feeling relationship. To think, one must feel, to feel, one must think. Thoughts register feelings and feelings give reason for thought.
It's very perplexing for me. In my equally bothersome and helpful mid-brainedness, I have trouble making decisions between thought and emotion. In every day situations, such as whose house I want to go to, I use logic, simple pros and cons and reasoning. But when it comes to very emotional things, I find myself feeling impulsive and desiring for whatever comes to mind first. But then, did I not just say mind? The mind is the place of logic. Hm. I can't really tell which side I use more. It takes great emotion for me to do certain things, but I also think of emotion logically. And pondering thought vs. feeling exclusively, as in this blog, just makes steam seep out my ears. I think too much about it and I go crazy! There are so many things to say. I can't say whether I think of logic as friends or enemies or even frenemies. There's just too much in me!
Maybe you will know.
Because maybe you are like other normal humanoids and have an obviously dominant side of brain.