Well, I found a Woman's Health magazine on the coffee table this beautiful morning, and I don't know where it came from, but I started reading it and I've decided that the people who write this thing are not particularly knowledgeable when it comes to the use of punctuation, exclamation marks in particular. Practically every sentence so far ends in a very unnecessary exclamation mark, like everyone is so excited to find out that this trendy black and white bag is inspired by Kate Spade's "famous boxy totes".
ex:
What mix is your mutt?
Tak[e] a quick online quiz! The free computer-generated test at whatsmydog.com pinpoints likely possibilities based on ear, head and tail shapes!
or
Stop thinking about what's bugging you and let your thoughts wander by doing something mindless, such as swimming, taking a shower or going for a walk!
Why is everyone so excited? It's really not that exciting. It's like they know that their magazine isn't as successful as other magazines, so they are trying to get readers re-excited about reading it with stupid exclamation marks. All it's doing is bothering me. It makes them seem unintelligent, or at least uneducated. I don't want to read a magazine written by people dumber than me; I would just write the magazine myself. Plus, and I know the swimming they were probably thinking of really is mindless (floating in a small backyard pool), but when I think swimming, I think of Michael Phelps propelling his huge self down a fast swimming lane, concentrating really, really hard on winning. Not mind-wandering material.
It's like the episode of Seinfeld when Elaine gets ragged on by Mr Lipman about using too many exclamation marks. He says it makes her seem dumb**. Even Mr Lipman recognises the stupidity of it all.
Lose the exclamation marks!
I mean...
Lose the exclamation marks.
XD
*also from Women's Health, the over-excited, girlish magazine.
**not exact words.
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